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LURVELY LIMERICKS

 


   
There was once a man named Kerr,
Who was a rather interesting sir,
With computers he was great,
But Del Tarrant he did hate,
And he definately suited leather, not fur!

BY CAZ

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
There was a dashing man named Del,
Whose teeth were as white as hell,
Said Avon to him,
Why are my teeth so dim,
Cos I’m better than you replied Del.

BY CAZ

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
There was a man who said “Well”,
How much we never could tell,
It was such a great amount,
I always lost count,
I think it was just to annoy del!

BY CURRER WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM CAZ

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
There once was a man named Gan,
His intellect, he found, was quite wan.
Despite this apparent flaw,
The Federation cannot him immure,
But a great heap of masonry can.

BY MANDA

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
There was a woman called Cally,
She never did dilly-dally,
With Avon she seemed,
To love, and she dreamed,
And, who can blame her, that intelligent Cally?

BY CURRER

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
There was a computer called Orac,
The Federation computers he did hack,
Got him from an old geezer,
Surely ‘t’would be easier.
To simply stuff him in a sack!

BY CURRER AND A LITTLE HELP FROM CAZ

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
Ze Klute was a right pot-toss,
At him the boys all did goss,
He thought he was so smart,
But Vila, with his cowardly heart,
Showed him who was boss.

BY CAZ AND CURRER

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
There was a computer called Slave,
Who was as much fun as a rave,
He was so polite,
But Avon was too up tight,
But the crew Slave did save!

BY CURRER

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
There was a lass called Dayna,
Out of her and Avon was saner,
Killed federation with bows,
But nobody knows,
Whether her and Del were together


BY CAZ AND CURRER

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
Gan was wide and Gan was tall,
While Avon was thin and small,
The Federation and weight he defied,
Pity he didn’t hear as Avon cried:
“GAN! WATCH OUT FOR THAT WALL!”

CAZ AND CURRER

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
There once was a page of Blake's 7 Limericks
A place to have fun and getyour kicks
The rhyming was endless
The irony nonetheless
Always contrived with maximum gimmicks

Maurice Brandman
 

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
On Gauda Prime's Gallery Floor
Kerr Avon saw Blake was no more
With a shot from his gun.
Then his friends, on the run
Died as Fed soldiers rushed through the door.


Patrick Chapman
 

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
Is Blake the right man to admire
a goal for us all to aspire,
Or should there be more
for the fans to adore,
Than a drop-out who tried to retire.

Count the ways that this man of renown
all too often let everyone down
How he killed off poor Gan
when the series began
With an arrogant uncaring frown

No, on Blake you could never rely
you would end with a tear in your eye
So lets just for the "Crack"
give young villa a whack
Cause at least he would Bloody well TRY!!!


lyndonw
 

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
Mostly about Vilakins, my favourite...

There was a proud hacker called Avon
Who fancied himself a real maven
Tried to take the Feds
for 5 million creds
Lost his freedom and all he was savin'.

There was a light-fingered young Delta
who followed a girl - a real belter.
Said Lucy Locket,
"He picked my pocket!"
Said Vila, "No no - I just felt her!"

There is a young rebel called Vila
who'd like to be a real lady-killer
but Cally is errant
with Avon, and Tarrant
makes poor Vila look like vanilla!

There was a pleasure-loving young thief
to whom fun and escapism was chief.
He drank too much soma
he's now in a coma.
We always knew he'd come to grief.

There was a young pilot called Del
who really liked to give Vila hell
for being lazy
and possibly crazy
Only violence makes Vila work well.

Nico Mody-Nikoloff

 

*     *     *     *     *     *
 
There once was a rebel called Blake
Whose principles, always at stake,
Were eventually tried
To the limit. He died
At the hand of a paranoid snake.


Patrick Chapman
 
 
 

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