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February Competition

Caption Competition picture of the month

This months winner brings water to your eyes
but we think that it matches the picture -

Avon: "Now, I suppose you're wondering why I've brought you all here today... IT'S NIPPLE-PIERCING TIME!"

by Kevin Clarke

Avon: Right Vila, this'll hurt, but it'll teach you not to get drunk and go to dubious tattoo parlours. And I don't know what you're looking so self righteous about Blake, that Servalan's coming off your stomach next...

by emmapeel@calvino.freeserve.co.uk

Avon: Vila, Gan's head appears to be growing out of your left shoulder. Hold still while I...

by Martin

OOH

by INKY

Avon: Now Villa don't be scared. We all did it and now its your turn to get this thing in your you know where. Hehehehe..........Villa: AAHHHhhhaaa!!!

by Cweam

Blake's idea for a WWF tag-team backfire
as he & Vila teleport up within 20 seconds of their deathmatch with Stone Cold & The Undertaker.

by John H

Avon: Kind of you, Kyzka, to remove your shirt. It makes it all the easier to blast your nipples off...!!

by Martin

Kyzka: Ok pal you got it! Gloves off for this caption contest!( Orders Avon to hold back blake and Vila ) I'll handle this kill im nut all by myself!!!!!!!

by Kyzka

The homeless situation in Space is getting worse - so Avon takes matters into his own hands.

by Anon

AVON: "Vila Restal, i knight you.....rise Sir Vila

by gina

Avon to Vila and Blake: "i knew this fancy dress party was a mistake. Trust you two to come as the same person. who are you again?"

by D.MILLER

Avon: Hey! It's that Kyzka-loony who's trying to kill that immensely-talented caption writer Martin! Kill 'im!!

by Martin

Thinks Martins got a serious brain loop disorder with the words ' kill im! ' So lets KILL IM!

by Kyzka

Avon: I paid £34.99 for this from Ann Summers. You two can get your own thankyou very much

by John Tapley

Avon: Well I hope you're happy with yourselves, running around the ship half naked.
Villa: You're just jealous because Blake has bigger breasts than you, Avon.
Blake: Shut up Villa.
Gan thinking to himself: I've got bigger breasts than both those guys.

by Harry Pitts

Avon: Look everyone,Vila has peirced nipples.
Vila: Hey...what wrong with that. Besides, I just wanted to be like Blake.
Blake(ebarassed):Shup up Vila!!!!

by U. R. Dumb

Avon: Hey! Jenna ISN'T doing a strip! Kill her!

by Martin

With the look on your face, Avon, your first name should be changed to Wayne.

by Rob

Ok, ok. Its just that Blake and I were hoping the topless policy might make the Liberator a little more... 'Liberal'.

by Whovian

Avon: Come on, cheap porn flicks are sure to buy us victory against the federation!

by cik

Avon: Hey! Vila's doing a strip! Kill 'im!

by Martin

in terminator voice: "I need your clothes, and your egg whisk"

by thom

Avon: OK lets go over this again. Blake, tonight you're the 3 legged cowboy, and Villa it's your turn to be the stuborn mule

by Matt

Villa: Gan, I hope thats your Handgun

by Matt

Avon: "Look, when I said I knew a bit about tattooing, I meant just a bit."
Blake: "Just get on with it, Avon. We're both having a topless Servalan on one arm and a flotilla of exploding pursuit ships on the other."

by Gerald

Jenna: If I could just get this hair out my eyes maybe I could see those manly chests

by cik

nice night for a walk

by cik

Take two bottles into the shower? Not me! Why not try Servalans Patent Mutoid Transformer for that whiter, bloodless look?

by Loatesy

Avon: I dub thee Sir Vila
Vila: Careful - that things sharp

by Simon

Villa: I know I said I could undo anything but this is getting ridiculous

by Joe Fox

Avon: Right boys, you distract Servalan with a rendition of the full Monty & I will blast her

Villa: I don't care if Robert Carlyle did this centuries ago it's too cold, she'll only laugh

by Ian Fuller

Avon's comment 'Don't Get Shirty!' meets with several hard stares

by Slave

Jenna gazes longingly at Avon, dreaming of being on the receiving end of his deadly weapon.

by the fan

Vila realised he'd always lose at strip poker until he found somewhere to hide the extra aces...

by emma d'avon

Jenna: Blake, why are you in such a bad mood today?
Blake: How would you like it if you had a cheap plastic wall sticking in your back like this?

by Martin

Vila: Let me tell you something "Mean Kerr"!
Me and the rest of the BWO are going to get the Universe Wrestling title from Servalan's Creeps in tonights barbed wire baseball bat cage match.

by The Blakester

Its another one of those boring Wrestling interviews with "Mean Kerr" Avon interviewing Vila and the rest of the BWO (Blakes World Order).

by The Blakester

Avon: Don't we usually put our shirts on first before going into battle?
Villa:(Drunk from the solar bar cafe) well now that you mention it,i can't remember

by Don

Avon: [Draws gun] If just ONE more of you suggests I take my clothes off too...

by Martin

Gan: Well, Cally?
Cally: No argument. Blake wins the "Who's-Got-The-Largest-Boobs-On-The-Ship?" award.

by Martin

Avon: Blake, Vila, when I said "Get rid of the gear" I meant put your guns away...

by Martin

Avon holds the weapon menacingly...

Avon: If anybody makes an offensive/libellous comment about this situation, there'll be trouble!

by the repentant fan


Oh dear, said Avon, am I in the wrong theme group? I thought this was Baco-foil wearers association.
No, moaned Vila. It's masculinity night. And I'm losing!

by One Who Knows

Blake: "I know my decisions aren't popular, but do we really have to make decisions this way?"
Avon: "We took a vote. Mud wrestling won."
Vila: "I wish I'd kept my mouth shut."

by Ewen Campion-Clarke

AVON: There you go Vila love, those chest hairs have curled up a treat!
BLAKE: Me next, me next!

by Oddboy

Avon: Hmm, this "Tarzan"-gentlemen doesn't look up to much when you meet him in the flesh.

by Martin

Gan: Psst, don't look now everyone, but I've seen something climbing up Vila's back...

by Martin

Rest of Crew: Avon, don't you ever suggest Paint Balling again!

by olympia

Avon: "Look villa, you cant go to the fancy dress party in the same outfit as blake. Jenna is going as a fairy, Gan as a medi-evil hangman, Blake is 1900's muscle man, Cally as princess leia and Im going as captian Zorg. It was agreed, you should go as a tin of baked beans. Now go and change your outfit!"

by Paul Maddox

Well did you get the part of He-Man, Vila ?

by Ming

Vila: Brrr, this radiator you've invented's rubbish, Avon.

by Martin

Avon: [Sniffing] Oh... Vila! You could have waited!

by Martin

Gan: Dammit, Orac!! Why'd you have to teleport us just as it was the GIRLS' turn to strip off?

by Martin

Vila: Gan, what ARE you doing back there?

by Martin

Jenna: Ow! Watch where you point that thing!

by Martin

Vila: Look, Avon, are you sure the cab driver said this was Bermuda?

by Martin
Untitled Document

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June 2000

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