Vila: Does the outfit only come in that colour and size?
Michael: No, sorry mate, Mad Max 2 is filming next door
Vila (thinks): Blimey, Kerrill seemed like a leather-clad beauty last night... what WAS I drinking?
Vila: Pleased to meet you. My nameīs Vila, I will be your proctologist.
Can I call you Babe?
Vila: Right, then give me the fiver and Iīll get the pints while you scare someone into giving up their table.
The Doctor "Came as fast as I could , Daleks again is it?"
Villa "Ah , no"
The Doctor "Cybermen then?"
Villa "Not quite"
The Doctor "Touch of the Zygons is it?"
Villa "No , Soolin and Dayna have locked themselves in the shower again"
The Doctor "Stand aside man , this is indeed an emergency"
The Doctor "Receeding ya say huh?"
Villa "Yep , gonna be bald by series 4 , can ya help?"
The Doctor "Hummmm , even the sonic screwdriver can`t help me with this one sunny!"
Vila: what are you staring at?
Bayban: that fly just crapped on your forehead.
Bayban: Thatīs not a leather clad hand your holding you know!
(imagine this in Colinīs voice & it really works!)
Villa: I know, I wanted it to be a Vicars and Tarts party too, but Avonīs all "No, Dentists and Leather Slaves will be funnier..."
Colin: " When they said Iīd be wearing leather, I thought - Great Iīd look like the cape-crusader"
Michael: " Instead, you look like ya from the īvillage peopleī"
Bayban: " Iīd like an hand-bag to match my attire, what would you recommend?"
Vila: " How about a change of clothing!"
Vila: Really? Butcher than who?
Im the man who put the big in bang.
Stop staring! Tarrant and I may share the same hair dresser, but I can assure you the similarites stop there...will you let go, please.
Villa: Bride or Groom?
Vila "Ya know , Avon`s gonna be pretty peaved with that outfit Bayban"
Bayban "Well he`ll just have to go out and catch his own Tarzian Worbstrangler then won`t he , that`s what I did"
Vila liked to muck about at the waxworks. It normally got a laugh...
Vila: Are you really? I always thought Goth was a planet!
Villa: "So YOUīRE the new president for the hairclub for men!"
Villa: "So, that sex change really helped didnīt it Mum?"
Villa - Do you do Pot Noodles ?
Vila: Actually, I WAS expecting someone else.
Vila: Thatīs not funny
Vila: "Mr Blair, welcome, uhhhh, interesting outfit..."
Tony: "Iīve just come from Georgeīs house and I didnīt have time to change..."
Vila: Hello Mr Vader, pleased to meet you.
Vila immediately regretted stealing then answering Avonīs personal email from īBabeī.
Bayban: Why so formal? Give me a big hug and a sloppy kiss, Villa
Michael: " Hello,Colin - whats this, the Doctorīs new look"?
Bayban: " Theres 90 credits Vila, now get me those DVDs"
Vila trid to think of a way to tell the psycho staring at his forehead that black didnīt always make you look slimmer.
Vila: " Paper raps stone!"
Bayban: " Drat, you got it again"
Vila: " Yes Iīm your man, what is it you would like me to open?"
Bayban: " That blue police box over there"!!
Villa: New gimp? Me? No, really, Iīd be terrible at that. Iīve got an unusually low pain threshold. I once fainted having a haircut.
Vila: "Leather, studs, psychopathic tendencies... you know, Iīm sure you remind me of someone..."
Vila:How do you get your hair like that ?
Donīt mind me, Iīm just auditioning for Doctor Who.
Welcome to world of leather.
V: Youīre probably gonna want to cut that hair for the Rob Halford lookalike contest...
Vila: Hello, Iīm Vila. You must be the psychopath. Can I have my hand back?