Avon: Vila, you canīt remove them from that angle.
Vila: I donīt care about the fluffy dice in his nose! I want the antennas in his neck for my TV!
Avon was quite tired of Vila and his nit-picking.
Cally: Are you sure itīs normal for humans to turn THAT colour...?
Avon: When Jenna gets out of the loo, Iīm first! Cally: Blake is also under a great deal of pressure. Gan: His eyes are turning yellow. Vila: The nerve pinch wonīt help much longer.
Only Blake could quite bring himself to stoop to Avonīs level...
Avon : Hurry up with that exploding teleport bracelet, I canīt keep Blake out much longer!
As Vila dismounted, Gan and Cally patiently waited for their turn at one of Blakeīs morale-raising piggy-back rides, while Avon prepared to jump the queue.
Gan and Cally patiently waited for their turn at one of Blakeīs morale-raising piggy-back rides, while Avon prepared to jump the queue.
Richard O`Brian ( off screen )
"Remember guys , you don`t get a crystal if you can`t unlock the puzzle and open the door"
Avon: So you think Blakeīs borg nanoprobes will help us open the door......
Vila: Either that, or we can all be assimilated and the guards will be so scared theyīll throw us out......
Cally: Iīm sorry, Vila, but I do need to remind you that you are not a neurosurgeon.
Vila: Whoīs going to be backup when Ganīs limiter fails? Blake doesnīt mind.....do you Blake? Blake.......
Avon: My God, youīre telling me Blake has been an android this whole time!
Cally: Iīve got to see this.....
Vila: Yep he has head lice.
Avon: Those bastards we have to get out of here!!!
Even Avon was impressed by Vilaīs ability to weave tiny little braids in Blakeīs hair.
New CIA techniques to fire men through a locked door go through rigorous testing
Avon pretended that HE had got a stiff neck too... but no-one took any notice...
VILLA: Letīs see who you /really/ are under this curly wig...
THE CREW: *gasp* Servalan!
SERVALAN: (disguised as Blake) And I would have gotten away with it too, if it werenīt for you meddling rebels!
Blake: I donīt have an alien implant, I swear!
the killer pixie
Cally took advantage of all the confusion to have a good grope of Ganīs bottom!
Vila: "Hang on, Iīve nearly got his muzzle off!"
Gan: "A fiver on Blake!"
Cally: "A tenner on Avon!"
GRRR GRRR SNARRRL GRRR!
AVON: And man descended from the apes!!!
Cally: Blake, I never noticed before, but it looks like we share the same hairdresser.
Blake,your shoulder muscles are so tense. Are you sure youīve not been under any kind of stress recently?
Vila worked feverishly to deactivate the Mutator bands, but Avon already had a huge left ear, Callyīs right arm had shriveled and Gan had grown another nose.
Avon: Donīt just stare, throw a bucket of cold water over them for Godīs sake!
Everyone noticed that Vilaīs technique at stealing necklaces left a lot to be desired.
Gan and Cally watched with interest as Vila prepared to peel Blakeīs wig off.
Avon: "VILA! - once youīve quite finished throttling Blake, will you get over here & open this darn door!!"
Vila to Blake: "Why do you always get yourself into these strange sub/dom experiences? It seems youīre taking the collar thing a tad bit too far!"
Avon: "Blake, all they wanted was for you to give them a little something to remember you by.
Next time, just bring your American Express card"
Avon: " Just great! - the next time you decide to treat us all to a meal, Blake - make sure you bring some money out with you, now we have to try and get out of here without doing the washing-up"
Vila: " Oh look everybody, Blakeīs hairs going gray"
Gan: " Oh yes, theres 1,2,..........."
Gan: Go on Vila! ... Heīs nearly done it Avon - when the guard comes in to check, twat him with your natty invisible walking stick.
As Vila works gingerly to release the mechanism whilst still leaving Blake with a head Avon gets ready to pop the empty crisp packet on his leg.
Vila: I told you he was infested, Iīve caught another one, Iīll have to pop it between my thumbnails.
Avon: Well now, charming! Iīm staying over here.
Meanwhile Cally tries to scratch her leg surreptitiously.
Here after several hours in solitary isolation we see behaviour patterns revert to primitive forms - an aggressive male guards the troop from attack, the lowest in the pecking order reverts to grooming skills and others watch on inquisitively.
Avon: Remember, both contestants doors open simultaneously, our lives depend on winning the Intergalactic Piggyback Race!
Vila: Why me Blake!? What if we canīt make it!
Blake: SHUT UP VILA! I wasnīt gonna carry Gan now was I?
Vila, sure that the Blake android had a malfunction, was checking the panels when all of a sudden...
Vila: Look at that! A micro-TV screening The Sound Of Music!
Gan: So thatīs why he keeps singing īthe hills are aliveī!
Avon: "We must stop the shrinking!! (itīll be bad for my knees)"
(Just thought of an extra line for that one)
Cally (thinks): Hang on, thatīs MY wig...
Vila: "Ok Avon, on the count of three - you open the door and Iīll catapult Blakeīs wig at the guard!"
Gan: "Brilliant - heīll think heīs under attack from some kind of flying poodle!"