While everyoneīs attention was focused on Tarrant no-one saw the "Wet Paint" sign on the grill Vila was leaning against.
Avon decided to amuse everyone by using his new glue gun to glue Tarrant to the floor.
Tarrant: Avon, you ****** ***** *****!
Well, NEARLY everyone was amused.
the killer pixie
The Scorpios lack of toilet facilities made the initial objective of planetary expeditions rather predictable.
TARRANT: Thatīs the last time I play sardines with you lot!
AVON: Since youīve managed to dispatch the dentist Iīll have to perform the extraction myself . . . with this.
TARRANT: Over my dead body
AVON: (nasty smile) Thatīs the idea . .
Tarrant suddenly realised that he was "hanging out"...
Bugger, I dropped my contacts
Avon: Look, next time Blake punches you, shoot him, Tarrant.
Tarrant:But thatīs not Marquis of Queensbury rules.
Vila flapping towel in background: Neither is what Blake did to the last challenger.
Soolin gathering teeth from the floor: These would make interesting hair ornaments, donīt you think?
Dayna, sulking:I donīt know why you wonīt let *me* take care of Blake.
Dayna, Vila and Soolin went to hold Tarrant down while Avon administered the injection
Vila knew it was wrong, but it was just too late to stop. He had to throw up right now, whether it went over the others or not.
Dayna: I know itīs sad losing Scorpio, but on the plus side my shoulder pads are shiny.
It was a sad sight, Tarrant out on the street begging for change
Tarrant: "I dunno, it all happened so fast... I just said īnice permī and the next thing I knew I woke up on the floor like this..."
Vila: "Yup, sounds like Blake alright..."
Avon showed everyone his new Fisher Price gun in an attempt to distract them from Soolinīs fornicating with a small, unconscious man lying on the floor of the ship.
A terrible accident with a neutron blaster and Avonīs fidgety trigger finger left Dayna and Tarrant irreversibly fused at the heads.
No amount of consolation would help - it was apparent Tarrantīs body WAS still shrinking
Ah , so that`s what goes on in these Federation rest centres , the randy little devils
That`s why they`re so cram packed every year
Before long it`ll be standing room only
That `ill put a stop to it !!!
Vila "It`s just not worth buying those cheap razors is it Tarrant"
PAUL: I should have known Iīd find you all sprawled around the bar now that Garethīs back on the set.
Everyone was agreed that this was the worst game of Sardines they had ever played.
Soolin: Look, itīs been rather a hectic day. I just havenīt had the time to do my hair, alright?
Vila looks away as he sees that Soolinīs wig is slipping off.
The crew realise something is wrong as the universe begins to fold in on itself. Dayna and Tarrantīs heads fusing was the first sign.
Tarrant: "Look, I havenīt got any more Fun-Sized Crunchie bars, alright!?! Now get away from me, you vultures!"
Steven was nearly doubled up with pain, and Michael was feeling just as bad. The rest of the cast agreed that the two of them should never have had that vindaloo left over from the end of season party the night before.
Vila: I think youīre going bald Tarrant.
Only Vila, with his chronic haemorrhoids, remained standing...
AVON: Tarrant, look, we;ve told you lay off the beans!
TARRANT: Er... I shot that man! Really!
Tarrant: you think youīre having a bad hair day Soolin? Iīve broken a nail!
It was Tarrantīs first acid trip, and the others were not happy with the state of the person who had sold it to him - being dead and all.
Tarrant: Avon I was joking when I asked if that was a gun in your pocket or were you just pleased to see me.
Vila: Somebody do something, my backīs killing me!
Dayna: Tarrant you look really rough, have been playing with the naughty boys down the street?
So we are agreed. On the count of three we individually pick up the guns *one at a time* and...
Tarrant decided to "come out" about his height and had left his elevated boots at home...
T: My god, Avon. When you said you would shoot the losers I thought you were just joking!
Tarrant: Who said playing Twister was easy?
Tarrant: "ok, you can all stop staring at me now... guys? Hello? Ok, this isnīt funny anymore... youīre really starting to freak me out now..."
Desperately they searched high and low
but no-one could find Soolin`s hair scrungy
Avon yet again found himself struggling with his urge to shoot people with silly curly hair...
Would he never learn? The crew helped Tarrant to his feet after he was thrown out of yet another karaoke club following his rendition of Leo Sayerīs "You Know I Canīt Dance"
The crew asked Tarrant why he couldnīt keep his clothes tidy!
The crew display their compassionate nature to endangered objects...
"I could swear the Mintie was there... did someone eat it?"