M: I don´t think the viewers are going to be all that keen on a futuristic Buffy: The Vampire Slayer set in a forest...
Travis: "This should keep those @#!*$% rebels out of my lettuce patch!"
Naturists create the latest vibrator in order to be at one with the trees
Travis "Clubbing isn´t what it used to be"
The poor mutoid did not even know that Travis was just about to the infamous Rod Stewart sketch...
Little did the mutoid know, Travis was psyching himself up for his Rolf Harris impersonation...
Travis: You know, I honestly don´t think footballs looked like that... maybe you´re thinking of cricket bats?
the killer pixie
T: One mistake and the Supreme Commander demotes me to making toothpicks for giants!
Travis: I´ve told you before, the stakes are *not* for spearing things on. They´re for building my retirement cottage!
Mutoid: I´m not spearing things on it. I´m catching my meal! Besides, you keep on saying that you´ll spear Blake with that stick you´re holding?
Travis: Erm... interior decoration?
Mutoid: You stick to your story and I´ll stick to mine!
Travis: Mutoid, stop strangling that small animal and come and smell this.
Mutoid: That´s no way to talk about Blake.
Travis: I always have a giant woodie when you´re with me.
Travis shows off his scout´s woggle for pointed stick building - first class.
Mutoid: Okay, you wanting to be Little John I can understand. But why do I have to be Friar Tuck?
Mutoid: You´ll never get a fire started with that.
This year´s Annual Leather Fetishists team building weekend was even more depressing that the last
Travis: You´re doing it all wrong. You need square lashing to hold that, not a diagonal.
Mutoid: Fine. You do it then. It´ll never work anyway, Blake´s companion will probably warn him just in the nick of time.
Travis: Right - I´ve finished the bat, once you finish the last of the stumps we can get started, where did you put the ball?
Travis: .. so I ended up with this all because of BLAKE! How did you get that thing? Mutoid: A perm went horribly wrong - I don´t like to talk about it.
Travis: I don´t know if I see the point. Point, geddit? Mutoid: Any more like that and I´ll snap my own needle off.
Mutoid: At least you don´t look like you´ve got your head stuck in a huge vegetable...
Travis: Oh I suppose I shouldn´t be so mad at Blake, the surgeon´s left an obvious hole in my eyepatch so I can still see and I expect by next year it will have healed up to the size of a small patch of Gaffer tape.
Mutoid: That´s what I call taking some stick!
Travis: Oh, very funny. Back to work or I´ll snap your needle off.
Travis decided to audition for a part in Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
M: I carved this pointed stick to be a physical representation of your manhood.
T: Take this one, it needs to be bigger.
Come on , move it , I promised the supreme commander she`d could move in by next Thursday
TRAVIS: "This is absolutely the last time I let Servalan organise the team-building exercise."
Travis´ entry in the first annual B7 kaber tossing competition was a little disappointing
Travis: You know, my wife doesn´t understand me, nor did my parents. I don´t think anyone has ever really loved me.
Mutoid: There, there sir. Kill Blake and you´ll be as right as rain.
Travis: I love these "get away from it all" weekends. The chance to get out in the wilds, be at one with nature...
Mutoid: And drain the blood from small creatures.
Travis: Yes Mutoid, I am a Rolf Harris fan - SO WHAT!
MUTOID: I don´t think Blake fell for the ´Teddybears´ picnic´ scam, Sir.
The Fetish club`s annual `steak out` wasn`t quite what Travis had expected